Ashram life – What not to do’s

Do not publicly announce that you are a meat eater and that you love to eat meat. This will NOT win you friends in an Ashram.

While anyone’s looking, do not flick ants and insects off your yoga matt, injuring or killing them in the process.

Do not recommend chemical industrial strength insect repellant and joke that nothing survives in your room.

I wont lie, my first day in the ashram was very difficult. It wasn’t the chanting in Sanskrit for an hour every morning and evening that I didn’t understand, or that my yoga teacher seemed to pick on me fixing basic positions that I thought I had excelled in years ago, or the fact that whenever I tried to meditate I thought of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory because the universal mantra ‘Om’ reminded me of Umpa Lumpa’s (pronounced ‘Oompa loompa’s’). In fact, I would visualise the Umpa Lumpa’s chanting ‘Om namah Shivaya’ the same way they would rhyme and dance the lessons in the original movie every time competing children were sent home.

I asked my teacher, an Israeli devotee what the last part meant.

T – ‘When I try to meditate, I end up thinking strange, weird thoughts and images that I would never normally think off, ever. It’s really messed up.’

Israeli teacher, probably thinking that I was having thoughts of murder and mayhem, started with –‘Sometimes we have bad thoughts and it doesn’t mean we’re bad people..’

T, cutting him off – ‘..But what does it mean if thoughts of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory keep appearing in my meditation?’

Israeli teacher –‘ That’s a children’s movie?(smiling) Sometimes we have irrelevant thoughts and we shouldn’t be forceful with them, or think that they represent us. They are just thoughts to be observed and then let go’

T – ‘Oh good.. I was worried it meant something.’ (like I was stupid?)

That first night I went to bed exhausted, with an early exit strategy, confident that I wasn’t going to last the 14 days.

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. dalethesnail
    Sep 21, 2010 @ 11:50:12

    So.. How are you feeling now??? 😀


  2. Chez
    Sep 21, 2010 @ 12:25:10

    ahhh T… control the monkey!!


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